Lonely Christmas

For a few years, I began to struggle getting into the Christmas season. Of course I loved the nativity scenes and the church services and the volunteer opportunities. But I had grown disgusted with the bustling culture of the season. The rampant consumerism. The pressure to get together and bring something. All of it felt a bit forced and definitely fake.

But then we had kids and the magic of the season returned. I felt like the Grinch, and my heart grew. My critical eyes grew a bit softer.

While this is the most wonderful time of the year for some people, for others it is not.

If you ask any funeral home director when they have the most activity, it’s this time of year. It’s not just the cold. It’s the emotional toll of loneliness.

As a pastor, the time of year hardest for the elderly under my care is always the holidays. Christmas is a day in which we have so many good memories. But some of the elderly among us are widowed and will sit in their living rooms only remembering good times rather than having a good time. Some of the elderly around us are stuck in nursing homes and hospitals, so while the rest of the world gathers around a table, these folks are often left to their rooms.

1 in every 14 Americans, 19 million people, spend Christmas alone.

There are a host of reasons for that, and it is true that some people want to be alone. But the truth is, many wish that they had someone to spend Christmas with. Sometimes it’s a person who has moved away from family and can’t afford to go back. For others, their family is hostile and going home would be less enjoyable than staying alone. Some people will have to work on Christmas. Some have health or financial strains that keep them from gathering.

Regardless of the reason, those who have ample space to gather have a real opportunity to open their lives to those who are lonely around them.

I will be going to several Christmas’ with people I know. The real gauge of how engaged I am with what Christmas is about is how many strangers I spend this Christmas season with.

Family is important at Christmas. But this year, may you enlarge your family. Visit a nursing home. Give a gift to a stranger. Invite a lonely neighbor over for breakfast.

Love you all. Merry Christmas!

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